Have you tried to talk to someone who doesn’t make  eye contact with you?  How do you know if the person you are talking with is really listening.

In some cultures, making eye contact with the person you are talking to, is a rude gesture, but in the Unites States, it could be considered a rude gesture not to make eye contact.

It is hard to really listen to someone. Eye contact, body language, feedback, no cell phones,….how exhausting. But doable…

Tomorrow, when you talk to anyone, boss, child, friends, anyone, try this:

Let the person know how much time you have to talk. If it is a child, give this information to them in concrete terms. For example, when the timer goes off, we have to stop talking for now, but we’ll talk again after your nap.

Get to eye level of the person you are really listening to…to make eye contact…for a child, this means sitting  down or stooping. For someone in a wheelchair, it will most likely mean sitting

Sit or stand at least arms length from the person…so you are not too close.

This is the hard part….don’t talk unless you are providing feedback to what the person is saying.

Body Language..Lean forward, keep arms unfolded . Have you tried to talk to someone and tell them something that is on your mind or share something that is very important to you just to see the person with their arms folded, or their bodies in a slouched position? This may make you feel like NOT sharing….

This seems like a no -brainer, but we all forget…..to REALLY LISTEN…

 

NURTURING NONNI